• diyerswanny posted a new activity comment 2 years, 8 months ago

    In reply to: Sibz wrote a new post, Cellmate Cellmate is a character study about a teenager named Aaron who is arrested for graffiti and taken to a holding cell, where, after a lot of confrontational dialogue, he eventually […] View

    Pretty decent script. You seem have good control of the language and the dialogue feels natural and realistic between Aaron and John. Simplicity is the key and focusing on these 2 characters in a minimalistic environment further compounds stronger character study. The main character’s arc and how he got to where he is today draws a lot of…[Read more]

  • diyerswanny posted a new activity comment 2 years, 8 months ago

    In reply to: Shaman_Elizabeth wrote a new post, EARTH SENTINELS: THE STORM CREATORS A fallen angel forms an alliance with shamans, totem animals and people affected by manmade environmental disasters to protect the planet, but […] View

    I liked the writing in this. The dialogue felt natural and worked well in the context of this screenplay. I did feel that this story somehow has been done before but either way, there is always something about the spiritual or supernatural that will hold interest in audience regardless of age. When reading through this screenplay, I did feel there…[Read more]

  • diyerswanny posted a new activity comment 2 years, 9 months ago

    In reply to: remivaughn wrote a new post, the Kiss A troubled painter on an obsessive quest for beauty and perfection, throws herself in the path of a killer who forces her into a gruesome alliance to create her masterpiece View

    Grisly and bleak but the concept is interesting and it runs along the lines of movie ‘The Skin I Live In’. Story will need spelling and grammactical checks to make it sound better. Be careful of some phrases used. The ending felt like a bit of an anti-climax though.

  • diyerswanny posted a new activity comment 2 years, 9 months ago

    In reply to: admin wrote a new post, Whigger The Western Pa. valley where the French Indian War began has run deep in blood throughout its history, however, more young men have died here in the crack turf wars than all of the […] View

    dry characters with laughable jive-talking dialogue. Story was predictable and pacing was shaky at times. Feels like this concept has been done before – a struggling man turning to crime to support his family – a rehash of 8 mile mixed with Boyz In Da Hood. The screenplay format was good at least.

  • diyerswanny‘s profile was updated 2 years, 9 months ago

  • diyerswanny posted a new activity comment 2 years, 9 months ago

    In reply to: JPachuski wrote a new post, Babies With Rabies Adam and Lucy are a young couple struggling with the decision of increasing their family by one. The decision, already scary for Adam, gets more complicated when a […] View

    An entertaining and lighthearted read but story, structure and dialogue poorly executed.

  • diyerswanny became a registered member 2 years, 9 months ago