Warriors of Matrimony
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Rating: 2.9/5 (9 votes cast)

Warriors of Matrimony

Warriors that marry from two different armies search for their kidnapped daughter.

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  1. Profile photo of williamhproductions@gmail.com
    April 22, 2015, 10:13 pm

    Two warriors. I like it

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  2. Profile photo of williamhproductions@gmail.com
    April 22, 2015, 10:12 pm
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    I agree with the other comments.

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  3. Profile photo of newfield
    newfield says
    October 19, 2014, 5:45 pm
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    I like the concept very much but agree there is something missing I would like to know – such as the “evil” person or group that kidnapped her.

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  4. bajasarah says
    October 9, 2014, 6:02 pm
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    Agree with all of the above

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  5. aweiss says
    January 21, 2014, 1:28 am
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    Much drama, no conflict. There should be a catch here, as i agree this logline needs to be fleshed out more.

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  6. April 26, 2013, 11:27 pm
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    There is something to be said for brevity–this has it.

    It is a bit awkwardly worded, though. My take:

    “Two warriors from opposing armies, united by love, search for their kidnapped daughter.”

    Mainly, it needs a different and more charged word from “different”. Good work so far, though! Perhaps needs a hint in the logline about era and setting (but I like a nice, short, clean logline–balancing act…).

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  7. April 11, 2013, 8:02 am
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    agreeing with the others

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  8. April 10, 2013, 8:39 pm
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    I agree with the other comments.

    Ron

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  9. gjdevlin says
    February 21, 2013, 6:05 pm
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    Interesting idea but why are two opposing factions looking for a kidnapped daughter? Does the threat apply to both of them?

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  10. hingylingy says
    February 19, 2013, 1:41 pm
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    Ok, a little trite.
    Romeo and Juliet with warring factions, which obviously one of kidnapped the girl?

    is there an outside force, beyond the warring factions?

    What is the real conflict here, the missing daughter or the two sides, or something else?

    One more sentence can do wonders for you!

    A new enemy may bring the armies together for their greatest battle yet…

    something like this… but I don’t know what it is, you do, because it’s your story!

    J

    J

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