Unlucky Acquaintance
User Rating:
VN:RO [1.9.17_1161]
Overall
Concept
Story Structure
Character
Dialogue
Grammar
Budget (1-Low / 5-High)
Rating: 4.1/5 (6 votes cast)

Unlucky Acquaintance

Story about two young man who decided to change their lives. They thought to write their own story about perfect family… But who wants to read about PERFECT family ?!

6 Comments

Leave A Reply
  1. Profile photo of Olich
    Olich says
    February 6, 2014, 2:32 am
    Overall
    Concept
    Story Structure
    Character
    Dialogue
    Grammar
    Budget (1-Low / 5-High)

    Let me be honest to you – this is the third work I have read here… And this I liked most.
    Brilliant idea, i didn’t expect what is going on till the end of the story.

    Exciting plot and succession of events throughout all the screenplay.
    Keep it on going! Don’t stop writing, the potential is high!

    VN:F [1.9.17_1161]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
    Report user
  2. Anna007 says
    January 29, 2014, 8:04 am
    Overall
    Concept
    Story Structure
    Character
    Dialogue
    Grammar
    Budget (1-Low / 5-High)

    The succession of events is quite unexpected until the very last page! The author is really talented!!

    VN:F [1.9.17_1161]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
    Report user
  3. Profile photo of Anastasia
    Anastasia says
    October 28, 2013, 12:52 pm
    Overall
    Concept
    Story Structure
    Character
    Dialogue
    Grammar
    Budget (1-Low / 5-High)

    The story ids defenitely cool and fresh. Easy to follow. It has good structure. I was enjoying while read it/ Good luck withn ext stage!

    VN:F [1.9.17_1161]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
    Report user
  4. Profile photo of Harvey-Patterson
    October 26, 2013, 10:59 am
    Overall
    Concept
    Story Structure
    Character
    Dialogue
    Grammar
    Budget (1-Low / 5-High)

    Dmitri:

    You’ve got an interesting idea here but I feel it need to be developed more fully. It takes a while to find out where the story is going. For a number of pages it sounds like the characters are preaching at great length about the evils of the world. It’s a little hard to believe Masha would get so upset about a photo of a woman kissing her husband on the cheek.

    Watch your grammar – e.g. P3 – How do know that? On P53 – is it Dan or Denis?

    Keep at it – Mario Puzo once said the secret of writing is re-writing.

    VN:F [1.9.17_1161]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
    Report user
  5. Dimastiy88 says
    October 24, 2013, 2:20 am
    Overall
    Concept
    Story Structure
    Character
    Dialogue
    Grammar
    Budget (1-Low / 5-High)

    Something new and experimential.

    VN:F [1.9.17_1161]
    Rating: +1 (from 1 vote)
    Report user
  6. Profile photo of peersterk
    peersterk says
    September 18, 2013, 7:52 am
    Overall
    Concept
    Story Structure
    Character
    Dialogue
    Grammar
    Budget (1-Low / 5-High)

    hi dmitry, i like your story but think it could be a bit more surprising. maybe a litle bit longer to build up the frustration of masha. its exiting when you understand someone is trying to set artem up but the reason for pitty and greek to do this sounds a bit weak to me. good potential!

    VN:F [1.9.17_1161]
    Rating: +1 (from 1 vote)
    Report user

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.