The Musician
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Rating: 3.3/5 (9 votes cast)

The Musician

In the near future, an almost untraceable method of communication of sensitive material has been developed. John, a once adored violinist, attends classical musical concerts to decipher sensitive information hidden in the music. During one concert in particular, John deciphers a message to kill. He was a man of secrets but not a murderer. He decided to lie low for a while but he began seeing a face from his past, a member of the agency who hired him, an infamous hitman.

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  1. Chidi says
    June 6, 2015, 3:58 pm
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    “In the near future, an almost untraceable method of communication of sensitive material has been developed.” This part is very compelling and creative.

    But the other sentences don’t build in it in a concise way. Just tell us how this will drive the story and affect the protagonist.

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  2. Chidi says
    June 6, 2015, 3:57 pm

    “In the near future, an almost untraceable method of communication of sensitive material has been developed.” This part is very compelling and creative.

    But the other sentences don’t build in it in a concise way. Just tell us how this will drive the story and affect the protagonist.

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  3. Profile photo of williamhproductions@gmail.com
    April 22, 2015, 10:03 pm

    A few touch up and this can superb. Great work

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  4. Profile photo of williamhproductions@gmail.com
    April 22, 2015, 10:02 pm
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    sounds intriguing

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  5. toojazzy says
    September 20, 2014, 12:01 pm
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    Shorten the logline to 2 sentences max. Love the musical aspect!

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  6. Vapit says
    September 7, 2014, 12:07 pm
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    I’m going to sit for this.

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  7. February 15, 2014, 1:03 am
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    Too much information, try rewriting in simplest form.

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  8. hingylingy says
    December 26, 2013, 1:07 pm
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    Can be quite intriguing. Add a stronger Orwellian aspect to this and you will achieve great heights. Decoding music in the future reminds me of a hybridized version of “Minority Report” which should be in your pitch – Minority Report meets Mr Holland’s Opus

    Also, it is way too long. It has to be one or two sentences at the most.
    This is the challenge of the log line. Also, you must define the stakes or the “What if?”
    and this must be done in a few short words…

    Premise is great
    Right up my alley as I am a writer of the Dystopian Sci Fi genre.

    Rewrite it – condense and refine it.
    no convoluted verbiage
    straight to the point
    Your guy decodes a message of murder
    He must stop the murder
    He is involved in a conspiracy…

    These are just the things that come to mind…. but I am guessing
    Let me know for sure…in your log line
    And, do it with much fewer words.

    Good luck

    Jay

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  9. scripted says
    December 12, 2013, 1:21 pm
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    Please rewrite

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  10. Profile photo of thomgoddard
    December 11, 2013, 4:53 pm
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    Is John sent to that “concert in particular” or has he attended ‘off duty’? Otherwise why would John have been sent to that concert if he isn’t a killer? If John has heard the message accidentally, and isn’t a killer, why does he know hitmen? Is John a “once adored violinist” and a former hitman?
    A little clarity and this would be superb.

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  11. November 30, 2013, 6:05 pm
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    this sounds like an awesome script, and i would love to read it, But i think you need to rewrite it, it just doesn’t flow well to me. Maybe try shortening it just a tad.

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