The Fresh Zulus: The Krown MCMLXXXII More Images
User Rating:
VN:RO [1.9.17_1161]
Overall
Concept
Story Structure
Character
Dialogue
Grammar
Budget (1-Low / 5-High)
Rating: 3.5/5 (1 vote cast)

The Fresh Zulus: The Krown MCMLXXXII

“Black Superman is a conscious defecting vigilante!” – Hunter
“Super powers can’t save souls.” – Kryptoman

13th Annual Filmmakers International Screenwriting Awards : Semi Finalist — The Fresh Zulus: The Krown – MCMLXXXII

7 Comments

Leave A Reply
  1. July 9, 2015, 5:23 am
    Overall
    Concept
    Story Structure
    Character
    Dialogue
    Grammar
    Budget (1-Low / 5-High)

    Went through just the beginning and the end. The end was fantastic. Would be glad if you went through my logline & synopsis for “THE PERFECT EPILOGUE” and the first page of “A place called Eden”. Your ratings and ideas are welcome

    VN:F [1.9.17_1161]
    Rating: +1 (from 1 vote)
    Report user
    • Flesh says
      July 9, 2015, 10:08 am

      Thank you very much Debasree! I shall look at THE PERFECT EPILOGUE and A Place Called Eden and rate with ideas this weekend! Once again Thank you!

      VN:F [1.9.17_1161]
      Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
      Report user
      • July 9, 2015, 1:27 pm

        thanks :)

        VN:F [1.9.17_1161]
        Rating: +1 (from 1 vote)
        Report user
        • Flesh says
          July 12, 2015, 9:08 pm

          I am not sure if you received this on your page :) Is it me or is this site slow and a little debuggy?

          You have the “EPIC” vision Debasree! A Place Called Eden

          I wanted more by that first page end — INSERT the date Establishes The Era without the necessity for a large paragraph to explain the situation in type — That could be acted out instead of a whole paragraph with the character acting “dialogue” to suck the viewer into that situation (emotions, anxiety big time, ego perhaps, certifiable war monger) Spec screenplay review Dr..Strangelove, Patton, even The Day After and a few classic war era films, propaganda films as research to juice up your theme and meat up the story line — a reason of climax and resolution

          Include your setting with your characters actions — slamming fists on the spacial round table McArthur ” You couldn’t handle the truth Hower’! (antagonist?) just as general example

          I tempt you to give us the action — setting — and — dialogue in the first quarter of the first page

          These tips I owe to the real script god consultation of David Trottier’s Screenwriter’s Bible 110%
          The 1 rule: action out that story as in the moment of actual scene situation and manipulation for twist or plot or conflict. I already can see the tension between the leaders escalating.
          I want to learn the story by what went down like a fly on the wall on that critical day meeting. That fly’s swatted death vs atomic bombs lol Uncle Dave recommends to Write Lean for the Eyes!

          Overall: I wanna read more !! What went down? Why is Churchill so confident and chill — There are endless possibilities!! Keep writing Debasree!

          VN:F [1.9.17_1161]
          Rating: +1 (from 1 vote)
          Report user
          • July 14, 2015, 12:46 pm

            thanks a lot. THANKS for taking the pains to go through the page. I’ve in fact already started working on your suggestions. And no, this didn’t appear on my page. 😛

            VN:F [1.9.17_1161]
            Rating: +1 (from 1 vote)
        • Flesh says
          July 14, 2015, 4:30 pm

          Look up: From Here To Eternity — a War 2 classic starring Burt Lancaster Deborah Kerr Frank Sinatra Donna Reed Oscar Best Picture 1953 :) read the love twists and plots synopsis — watch it play out in effectively in the movie!

          VN:F [1.9.17_1161]
          Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
          Report user
          • July 15, 2015, 3:32 pm

            Yeah, I’ve watched the film more than once, but now that you suggest it, I’m going to read the script too! Thanks for suggesting. :)

            VN:F [1.9.17_1161]
            Rating: +1 (from 1 vote)

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.