Take A Trip More Images
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Rating: 2.9/5 (4 votes cast)

Take A Trip

Guy, who made his phone into a time/space machine, travels with his friends back to 1968 to enlist the help of hippies with Guy’s plan of saving the US, which in the present day is a right wing dictatorship.

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  1. March 8, 2017, 12:45 pm
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    As Lee says, copyright is very important to protect your work. The formatting is good, you do have some misspellings. I’d recommend to revise it and then protect your project. Good luck!

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  2. Profile photo of raydavenport
    January 1, 2015, 4:51 pm
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    Hello there, I get the overall challenge, the why and the what be I have to say that the how and the when is off beat. The fight against the RIGHT WINGERS, okay I get that part but if he is using hippies for inspiration that’s okay but to bring to the future? I don’t see it!

    If GUY comes up with a way on his own with the help of his lady to fight the right wingers and using time travel as an edge, that sounds better.

    Plus you have spelling errors and grammar mistakes but it don’t take away from the story, this kind of remind me of Back to the Future films.

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  3. Profile photo of marsed.harizi
    December 10, 2014, 2:53 am
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    Hi,

    Since this is a script that combines sci-fiction, Drama, and that tries to express values that have mankind has pursued for centuries like: Freedom and Revolution, in my opinion you should have worked more on the title. TAKE A TRIP – is too soft.

    I like the concept, and it has a big potential. What I see that doesn’t work is the story structure. It lacks conflicts and the telling of it is linear.
    Another point I want to mention is the antagonist – Lambert. This character is second important in the movie but is forgotten almost in the story. This character must have been developed more and must have been put to the test more.
    There are also so grammar errors but nothing major.

    Good luck on the competition.

    Marsed

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  4. aweiss says
    September 26, 2014, 3:11 pm

    Leon,

    Thanks for the review. The script is registered with the WGA, so no qworries there.

    Andrea

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    leeoconnor says
    September 26, 2014, 12:09 pm
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    Hi Andrea,

    I read the first few pages and I think you have a good story here. If few minor formatting issues but nothing you can’t iron out.

    One being –
    INT. LEON’S APARTMENT – DAY

    Just get rid of the “day when returning to the scene, no biggy.

    I would recommend copyrighting this, as it’s says you haven’t, just a suggestion.

    Lee

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