Girl Code

Where do I begin. There are so many problems with this script.
1. Too many one liners back and forth! People do not converse this way.
2. Too many insignificant characters. Since the dialogue was so thin, it was hard to remember who was who.
3. Many grammatical errors.
4. I did not “buy into” the idea of a girl code. Never heard of it; wouldn’t care about it.
5. I did not care about mary, the main character, because I didn’t get into her head through the weakness of the dialogue.
6. Virtually no rising action. I was on page 40 and I still didn’t know where this story was going to go. At that point, I really didn’t care.
7. I found the jokes hackneyed. The college football “thing” at the end solidified the amateurish writing.
8. lastly, I find it odd that a man would write a chick flick. Unless you can really get into the heads of your women and write realistic dialogue, the overall effect is that you are out of your element.