Awakening Part 1
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Rating: 2.8/5 (11 votes cast)

Awakening Part 1

A wizard discovers demons controlling the four kingdoms of man and recruits a young hero to assassinate leaders. The son of his fallen friend. (Updated: July 16, 2013)

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  1. Profile photo of RutgerOosterhoff
    April 29, 2015, 3:58 am
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    It’s not bad but confucing.

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  2. scripted says
    November 29, 2013, 1:39 pm
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    logline confusing

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  3. paul says
    August 8, 2013, 9:57 am
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    Although it could be interesting the logline still doesn’t do it for me. Who is the protagonist – the wizard or the young hero? Although you mention “hero” and it is assumed he is the protagonist, assassinating leaders essentially makes him an antagonist. What is his main objective? Domination? Are the leaders from the Demons or from Man?

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  4. mdub says
    July 16, 2013, 5:36 pm

    New logline up

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  5. wardparry says
    October 26, 2012, 1:32 pm
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    I’ve got too many questions here, which is not ideal for a logline.

    – What is a rouge wizard?
    – Who are the new generation of heroes? What do they do?
    – What are his motives?

    If you can answer these kinds of questions with your logline, and you have a trippy script ready to rock, this sort of fantasy swords and sandals vibe is the way to go. WP

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    chalkyc says
    October 6, 2012, 12:51 pm
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    Do you mean ‘rogue’? Could be interesting, based on your references, but the logline didn’t hook me.

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  7. Profile photo of jusork
    jusork says
    September 6, 2012, 9:04 am
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    If not for your film references, I’d have no idea what you mean by the four kingdoms of man or what the kingdoms of man even are. And what does the oncoming war have to do with the wizard’s discovery of demons in power? I think you also throw a wrench at the end by basically suggesting that the wizard is evil since he wants power. Is this story about his struggle to gain power? If so, you should rework it around that.

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  8. rickemg says
    August 16, 2012, 11:24 am
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    This story intrigues me. Maybe a quick line describing the four kingdoms would whet my appitite more. The concept is lofty, lots to create within a 90-120 page script.

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  9. Profile photo of mistererock
    July 9, 2012, 3:10 pm
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    I agree with the other comments. What makes the Wizard rogue (or rouge?) So, if I am reading the logline correctly, the Wizard is recruiting new “heroes” to win against the demons, but plans on double-crossing the “heroes” to turn the tide in his (the Wizard’s) favor, which, I would presume, is a different favor than that of man? Am I getting this right? If so, it should be stated more clearly. If not, then I am pretty lost in this logline.

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  10. Profile photo of tserlin
    tserlin says
    June 27, 2012, 9:33 pm
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    Very interesting but slighty confusing — the wizard is recruiting the heroes — to end the oncoming war… OK that’s cool. But, in his favor – sort of gives it all away. You want to tantilize the potential reader a bit more. Concept is strong. A little work and the logline will be very compelling.

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  11. June 13, 2012, 1:07 pm
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    Did you mean rogue wizard?

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  12. mdub says
    June 8, 2012, 8:46 pm

    Thanks for the input!

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  13. Profile photo of garyg
    garyg says
    June 8, 2012, 6:43 am
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    Sounds interesting but I don’t know what a rouge wizard is. The thing that sticks out is that there’s 4 kingdoms at war instead of the usual 2 – ambitious but if it delivers it would be twice the awesome.

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