Andy: The Chronicles Of A Real Superhero
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Rating: 3.7/5 (3 votes cast)

Andy: The Chronicles Of A Real Superhero

A cantankerous professional superhero has troubles finding a job and leading a normal life after a new, cooler, and generally more heroic superhero becomes a media darling and pushes him into retirement.

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  1. Profile photo of Kurt-Mayes
    Kurt-Mayes says
    February 14, 2014, 5:19 pm
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    Hello Mark, I’ve just finished reading your script. I can’t say I’m the biggest fan of superhero films, however I do appreciate them and especially those that are twists on the old superhero convention. This script I believe falls successfully into the latter category. What if a superhero doesn’t want to be a superhero? I know this is something ALL superhero’s go through at some point and it has been shown on the big screen plenty of times, but I like the comedic angle you have taken here.

    Andy was a very likeable character. Even though he was a superhero, he was still very human, and very relatable. Who hasn’t got sick of their job and wanted to take a well-earned break? I liked that you didn’t dumb his character down, which could have been an easy way of portraying his failure as a superhero. He had dignity, just a crisis of consciousness.

    A lot of the humour I felt came through in the conversations. I think if you want to rely on conversational humour for the majority of the comedy then it needs to be plentiful. This can be easily done because you hear or come up with funny anecdotes all the time that can easily be worked into dialogue.

    Where I think the script struggled was the dialogue portion. It wasn’t all that captivating, and at times I think there was just too much. Characters were taking a really long time to explain things, and often repeating the same subjects. It was because of this that I thought the story structure also suffered a little bit.

    Overall, a fun concept and very marketable given the popularity of superhero films and comedy films. A little bit of tightening up with another draft or two should fix the structure problems and I think this script will be in great shape.

    Best of luck with the competition.

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  2. mikeyz says
    January 31, 2014, 10:11 am
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    Cute and clever concept – a down and out superhero forced into retirement to make room for a new, younger guy — who actually turns out to be a fraud! Hilarious premise and as the other reviewer said – quite sell-able.

    The actual execution of the concept is good – but not great. The story gets caught up in little details, too many, most coming during Andy’s vacationing. His relationships are intriguing but they are not explored enough to garner any interest or empathy from the reader towards his cause.

    Clarification needed … the father introduced as Richard but then dialogue is from “Gus” – pg. 18. Writing is good but sometimes the grammar gets a tad lazy – you forget periods and add too many commas making the wording confusing and hard to follow at times. A solid proof-reading is required to turn this into a true little gem!

    Overall, a smart and fun little story which was quite an enjoyable read!

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  3. tbarron says
    August 18, 2013, 4:23 pm
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    Fantastic concept. Clever and funny. Great superhero spoof.
    Some of the images are just brilliant (eating frozen pizza, etc.)
    Would like to see Mr. Marvelous appear earlier.
    His 2nd job and how/why he gets it could be a little tighter.
    Does need a thorough proofread.
    Really really enjoyed it. Very sellable.

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